Dandalion wins Celebrity Dead Pool for 2024 as I cannot find the list that I had for 2024.
She correctly anticipated the passing of Shannon Doherty for a 57 point hit (47 for the age as well as first cadaver and last gasp). She could get more points before the end of the year, but I will pay up.
The long time readers have well known that I am a fan of the erotic, the sensual, and sometimes the down right dirty.
There is a facebook page (facebook.com/PissedOffPirate) that covers the comedy side and I keep it devoid of politics. It is a place that I can share laughs as long as Facebook allows it. Those rat bastards do not understand humor. They ding me for failed fact checks. Who they hell care if their joke of the day is factual?!? I want it to be funny and that is it. What is next, objecting to a joke about two unicorns walking into a bar? (there is bound to be a joke for that, I just do not know it.)
As a step up, I have a private group on facebook (facebook.com/groups/PissedOffPirateAfterDark). By private group, I mean we do our best to weed out the kids. There is nothing that would be illegal for the underage to see, but we do not want to prematurely educate someone’s kids. That group is more adult oriented humor with some discussions mixed in.
There is a Tumblr page, but I have not done anything with it in over a year.
I do have a Twitter/X account (@Pissed0ffpirate) Be sure to use a zero not an O… someone beat me to that one.
Now, I have set up a Discord server (POP: Even Darker) to really expand the discussions or many adult related topics. It is a space space above all. The differing rooms help offer discussions to meet each persons needs without shoving the topic upon someone else who may not be into whatever the genre is of the room.
For the next seven days you can use this link (https:discord.gg/rAqgjZDk) after the week it will expire, but you can hit me up and I will get you a fresh link.
Come give it a look and see if you find a spot that you would enjoy.
This is a post crafted by Google Gemini as I was having a hard time getting the concepts into written form and I wanted to break the blank page syndrome that I often have. I loved the output so much that I am opting to use it for simplicity. (Thank you Google)
Animism is a belief system that holds that spirits or souls exist not only in humans but also in all living things and objects in the natural world. This includes plants, animals, rocks, rivers, mountains, and even weather patterns.
Animism is one of the oldest and most widespread belief systems in the world. It can be found in traditional cultures around the globe, from the indigenous peoples of North America to the tribes of Africa and Asia.
Core Tenets of Animism:
Animism vs. Other Belief Systems:
Animism is sometimes compared to other belief systems, such as pantheism and polytheism. Pantheism is the belief that God is identical with the universe, while polytheism is the belief in multiple gods.
The Importance of Animism:
Animism offers a unique perspective on the natural world. It teaches us to respect nature and to see ourselves as part of a larger whole. Animistic beliefs can also be a source of comfort and guidance, as they provide a way to connect with the spirits of the natural world.
Because of what I do for a living now, those who have been following me for the last seventeen years (yes, time flies when you are drinking rum) no longer know where I work. Oh I did have that one dude who I fucked up his run for office and tried to get me fired over it… He got in touch with HR. What was his name, he swore he would make my life hell if I mention it. I guess I will have to find his name again.
Well back to the topic of the day. I am a federal employee. Not a big secret there are after all over two million of us. Now specifically where I work? That I am not revealing in a public forum. As a fed, I work with contractors.
I started as a contractor like so many do. Today, I took a stand for my colleagues as I refused (and will always refuse) to treat them less than I or anyone else. Yes, there are areas where we have to be treated differently due to regulations. We are good with this as rules are rules and by and large those rules are there to prevent issues in the ethics realms. (of course the previous administration could not spell ethics, let alone comply with them.) As an example, if a team has an event where the govt is paying for the fed’s food, the feds cannot pay for the contractors. Okay, the contractor’s employer or the contractor themselves are feed to pay that tab and both the feds and the contractors can enjoy the event together.
It will be a cold day in Hell before I treat people differently because of who signs their checks. These particular people are people that I love dearly. They are there for me ANY time that I need them, either professionally for my role, or personally as a fellow human being.
I took my stand in a meeting, and this caused a manager and wannabe manager to vocally state the positions that we were to treat them as less than feds. Screw that noise.
If you are in my closer circles, you understand that I hold my work family as dear as my own, and in many cases, closer.
There are people who have tangled with me that feel/felt that I do not carry myself with a high degree of respect. Those in my circles know better. they know that respect is a core tenet of my existence. My respect for nature and the animal kingdom surpasses even that for my fellow humans. But that is another topic.
For those that wish for me to follow the guidance of this morning and other recent days. Fuck off. You are simply lowering any forms of respect that we have/had for you. I will also not be silenced. You will have to deal with hearing from me if I feel that you are oppressing a loved one.
Just because something is procedurally correct, it is not necessarily right.
This is going to be an evolving post. Meaning I will be adding names and numbers to it.
Why am I so pissed about this company? Well, for over nine months they have been harassing me. It is not even me that they are trying to reach. It is Daniel something or another.
I have tried asking nicely with all of the empathy and politeness all the way to brutally profane. I even let one of them give me their presentation in the hopes that I could politely decline their offered product (a “discounted” Vegas travel package that sounds like a good deal, but likely crap content). My wife tries to remind me that these people are just trying to do their job and that they are call center slaves just like we used to be. (The only real difference is that we were tech support and these are sales scuz.)
Now that I am pissed enough, I will start detailing what I can about them here. It will not be my fault if someone initiates without my knowledge or request, DDoS attacks, email bombing campaigns, war dialer campaigns, random calls,, who knows what all manner of disruptive acts some unhinged individuals may choose to carry out as they may also be frustrated with how these kinds of campaigns bug the hell out of them.
I will see if I can find the log that I started working on.
(725) 279-0554 04/18/2024 8:11pm – Missed call, no message
(725) 237-4201 04/19/2024 12:11pm – Hung up when I answered (their display probably showed I was a DNC)
(725) 288-0283 04/19/2024 4:57pm – Hung up on me, then when I called back they thought I was Daniel. (I got profane)
I asked Copilot “How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.”
This was its response
Ah, the timeless riddle of the industrious woodchuck! 🌳🪓
If a woodchuck could indeed chuck wood, it would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck. But alas, the true measure of a woodchuck’s wood-chucking prowess remains shrouded in mystery, hidden beneath the forest canopy.
Some say it’s a mere cord of firewood, while others whisper of entire lumberyards disappearing into the earth at the woodchuck’s determined paws. Legends speak of woodchucks challenging beavers to log-rolling contests, their tails flitting like metronomes, counting each timber tossed.
Yet, the woodchuck remains stoic, its tiny eyes fixed on the horizon, contemplating the weight of its arboreal destiny. Does it dream of sequoias or ponder the density of oak versus pine? Only the ancient oaks know, their rings echoing tales of woodchuck lore.
So, my dear seeker of woodchuck wisdom, let us embrace the enigma. For in the heart of every forest, there lies a woodchuck—silent, resolute, and forever pondering the eternal question:
“How much wood could I chuck if I could chuck wood?”
And the leaves rustle their secrets, but the answer remains elusive, lost in the whispering wind.
Oh, that fun old phrase. I have heard it many times over the years.
Yes, I have been accused of being a know it all. I do not know it all, but given my background and essentially having five parents form a variety of backgrounds I have had a wonderful sampling of experiences. Some experiences have been great, others not so much.
For today’s tale from Griz involves that phrase used in the title of the post. I think part of it was mentioned in the post about Trigger Warning and PTSD.
“You wouldn’t know what you would do if someone shoved a gun in your face.”
That one is quite presumptuous. Many of us roaming around are veterans. The less fortunate have been combat vets and had to deal with this situation more times than you would want to know. [Free tip of the day form a vet to a civilian: Never, and I mean NEVER ask a vet if they have killed anyone. Little kids get a pass, but will likely get a kind request to never ask that question in the future.]
In my case, I am quite fortunate. I am a combat era vet, but not a combat vet. A combat vet is pretty obvious, they saw action. A combat era vet served while there was combat action, but they were not part of it. I was discharged as Gulf I was spinning up and due to a service connected injury so I was spared what my brothers and sisters in arms endured.
Now The first time that I had a pistol thrust in my face, my reaction was a bit different than the next time it happened. I had just turned the ripe age of 15. Now my step dad had this idea to no longer be a renter, be a home owner. Well the home, was full sized conventional school bus. The joke at the time was that my room would be a trailer, and when I turned 18, he would just pull the pin and I was to hope that we were parked at the time.
If you have ever been in an older bus, you may know how the door gets opened. There is a handle reach from the driver’s seat with a long rod that connects to the door. When it is pulled closed, it snaps over a small hump to be a lock. Now, if you want to open the door from the outside, you do a CPR style thrust to the screws where the rod attaches to the door. Sometimes it may take a few thrusts to get that handle to pop over.
I was about to move to Maryland with my Dad and step mother so I was having some farewell gatherings and was staying out late as it was July with great weather. When I got “home” that night, I was struggling with the lock. Then all of a sudden I got it. the door popped. Only it wasn’t me that opened the door it was my step-father. All I was was the muzzle of his Colt 1911 staring right in the middle of my face. Yes folks, it was pretty much the way that you see it depicted in the movies. That barrel sure looks HUGE! The teachings of my youth kicked in. Freeze, keep hands in view, and be calm. It only took a moment for me to be recognized and allowed in.
Once you face the one eyed stare and lived to tell the tale, it is easier the next time. For this I have to fast forward to 1989 when I was a whole 22 years old and in uniform. Like many of the enlisted men at Fort Benning (As it was called then) I went to the enlisted club on Main Post to drink and enjoy the music. At that time that music was accompanied by scantily clad young ladies (well then they were my age and a little older. As I look back, YOUNG, but legal ladies) and they had less on as the music continued. I have always carried the bouncer mentality and tended to befriend the DJs and dancers always happy to watch over them.
On this particular evening the DJ and his girlfriend had a bit of a tiff. She stormed out and the DJ was stuck in the booth. I had given her a couple of moments, then followed to check on her. After looking for a few minutes I saw her in the passenger seat of a pickup. I walked over and opened the door and was starting to ask her if she was okay. I think the conversation started off like “Are y… [sound of a round being chambered into a .45]” Only this time, I did not freeze in place, like I was taught to do. Now I holding onto more refreshed instructions and reactions. I simply rapidly reached over jammed the webbing between my thumb and forefinger between the hammer and the slide, then closed my grip over the weapon, disarming the prick who dared draw on me. Yes, had he had the balls to pull the trigger I would have had a hell of a blood blister. If he had balls AND reflexes, I could have been dead. Having “his” pistol in my possession, I finished my sentence. “Are you okay?” she said she was so I closed the discussion with throwing the pistol back at fucktard, telling him that if he ever came near me I would kill him without question. At that, he started the truck and flew out of there like his ass was on fire.
Sad thing for him was that a pen and notepad is part of your uniform. That make it cake to grab the license plate as he fled. Another thing that did not make his night is that the MPs are always roaming around the enlisted/NCO clubs since we tend to get drunk and rowdy. It you are one of my more regular readers, you have already connected the dots. The MPs rolled in and I had a chat with them about my all to recent encounter. I decided that I had had enough fun for the evening so I am a couple buddies rolled to his off post trailer. When we got their we got a call from the MPs. PFC (maybe he was a sergeant) Titus has a suspect that they needed me to come to identify. Okay, cool, I am on my way. I stroll in, PFC Titus leads me to a window and low and behold there is a very dejected and upset fuckwad and as a bonus a co-fuckwad.
It turns out that the fuckwad twins were medical holdovers like myself. Just waiting for their discharge orders to go home. Here’s the difference, I was just doing some drinking and doing my duty during duty hours. These guys were caught, on post, drunk, DUI, and in possession of not just loaded firearms, but a bunch of stolen parachute gear and other military property that they were not supposed to have.
If you are familiar with the military justice system, it is fairly different than the civilian system. We are property and get treated differently. They very likely turned their almost out status into convicted felons serving time doing hard labor (I was told that at Fort Benning, hard labor mean pretty much splitting wood form sun up to sun down with meal breaks. Maybe it is true, maybe it isn’t. I would like to hear form some with a definitive answer to know.) then when their sentences were over, they would be given dishonorable discharges before they could head for home with their tails tucked between their legs.
To this day I have not had to stare down another muzzle unless it was one that I owned and was cleaning or inspecting.
I did once face a drunk man with two knives. That was a fun New Year’s Eve. Long story short, I was bouncing for a roommate at her bar. Dude was too drunk and got belligerent so she tossed him. He did not think that a woman had the right to stop a man from drinking. Now, she COULD have dealt with him, but I stepped in (sorry ladies… at least now I wait to see if you want me to step in, or if YOU want the fun of dealing with these assholes.) and he pulled the two kitchen knives. I did an outside crescent kick taking one knife from him while shaving a layer of two from my combat boot. That pissed me off later as I had hours of spit shining on those boots. Estúpido borracho retreats to his car and it starting it up. I on the other hand and now wound up tight. I spotted a section of pipe and proceeded to go to town on tonto borracho’s car. That window was TOAST and he tore off out of the parking lot, but not before hit me with his car. I saw the hit coming and jumped up to reduce the impact. I bound off the windshield and rolled off the side. Jackalope was playing pinball from car to car for who know how many blocks before the cops got him. I spent the stoke of midnight that new year in the ER at Bethesda Naval Medical Center getting glass picked from my scalp and making sure that nothing else was damaged.
So yeah, for many of life’s adventures I do happen to fucking well know how I would react. Next time you are tempted to ask a stupid question, rethink about it. Think about the odds and probabilities that you will not like the answer or it may make you look the fool.
Some wonder why I am so critical of the Israeli government. This is one of the reasons. To be clear, I do not have issues with the people of Israel, especially those that are survivors of the pre-Israel days and their plight of roaming while being persecuted.
The attack on the USS Liberty remains one of the most controversial and debated incidents in modern military history. On June 8, 1967, during the Six-Day War between Israel and its Arab neighbors, the USS Liberty, a United States Navy technical research ship, was attacked by Israeli air and naval forces off the coast of the Sinai Peninsula in international waters. The attack resulted in the death of 34 crew members and the wounding of 171 others. The circumstances surrounding the attack, including its causes, motivations, and aftermath, continue to be subjects of intense scrutiny and speculation.
The USS Liberty, a converted World War II cargo ship, was equipped with electronic surveillance equipment and was stationed in the eastern Mediterranean Sea to monitor communications during the Arab-Israeli conflict. On the day of the attack, the ship was flying the American flag and clearly marked as a U.S. vessel. Despite this, Israeli aircraft and torpedo boats repeatedly attacked the Liberty for over two hours, subjecting it to strafing runs, napalm bombings, and torpedo strikes.
The Israeli government initially claimed that the attack was a case of mistaken identity, asserting that Israeli forces had misidentified the USS Liberty as an Egyptian vessel. According to Israel, the attack occurred amid the chaos of the Six-Day War, and the Liberty’s presence in the area was not communicated effectively to Israeli forces. However, many skeptics have questioned this explanation, pointing to various factors that cast doubt on the official narrative.
One aspect that has fueled skepticism is the advanced surveillance capabilities of the USS Liberty, which included sophisticated electronic intercept equipment. Some believe that Israel may have attacked the ship to prevent it from intercepting communications or gathering intelligence that could have been damaging to Israel’s war efforts or revealed its military strategies. However, concrete evidence supporting this theory remains elusive.
Furthermore, survivors and witnesses of the attack have reported incidents that seem difficult to reconcile with the idea of mistaken identity. For instance, crew members have described Israeli aircraft flying low and slow over the ship for an extended period before opening fire, as well as machine gunners targeting sailors who attempted to extinguish fires or launch lifeboats. These accounts suggest a deliberate and sustained assault rather than a mere case of misidentification.
In the aftermath of the attack, the United States government launched multiple investigations to determine the cause and circumstances surrounding the incident. The initial inquiries conducted by the U.S. Navy and the CIA concluded that the attack was a tragic case of mistaken identity. However, subsequent investigations, including those by independent researchers and journalists, have raised serious doubts about the validity of this conclusion.
Despite the evidence suggesting that the attack on the USS Liberty may have been intentional, the controversy surrounding the incident persists. Official documents related to the attack remain classified, contributing to speculation and conspiracy theories. The lack of a definitive explanation from the Israeli government has also fueled skepticism and mistrust.
In conclusion, the attack on the USS Liberty stands as a tragic and contentious chapter in the history of U.S.-Israeli relations. While the official explanation points to a case of mistaken identity amid the fog of war, lingering questions and inconsistencies continue to cast doubt on this narrative. The incident serves as a reminder of the complexities and uncertainties of warfare and the importance of seeking truth and accountability in the face of tragedy.
When I was in high school, I remember quite vividly watching the evening news one evening when a Palestinian boy had thrown a rock at an Israeli soldier who was in full battle dress uniform. What was the response for that transgression? Well it was quick, the boy was murdered by the solder.
I wanted to know why this boy risked his life like this, so I started to look into how Palestine was stolen by Israel.
Yes, I saw it as being stolen and for many years, most of my life in fact, I viewed the nation of Israel as Palestine.
Pretty recently I was pressed to look more deeply at the Palestine/Israel situation. This time, I went more deeply than I did as a young punk.
My views were also tempered by my military service. Yes, Israel has long been an ally to the United States. (I will NEVER forgive Israel for her attack on the USS Liberty. https://www.usslibertyveterans.org/)
We pour a cubic buttload of money into Israel. For what? Seemingly to have a “friend” in the Middle East.
Now, we give a bunch of money to Palestine as well. Why? Well for humanitarian reasons.
So let’s discuss the situation between the two “nations”. I am using nation for Palestine eventhough they really do not have a nation. They are but a mass of people living on land that their owners permit them to occupy.
Palestine wants a) its land back, b)sovreignty, and c) the elimination of Israel. For most of my life, I thought I understood their plight and shared the view.
Israel wants a) peace and b) per Bebe the elimination of Palestine.
The two sides wish to occupy the same land, yet eliminate the other. This cannot and will not work. They are unable to come to any form of understanding. Now with that said, I still despise the Israeli government for how it behaves, conducts itself, and pushes others.
For Palestine… meh, they have lost their claim to the lands. To the victor go the spoils.
On numerous times they have been offered land, and peace, but they are absolutist and will not accept the deals. When you initiate a war, and you lose land, you also lose the claim to it, legally and morally.
Lets look at the major milestones of their wars:
1948 Arab-Israeli War: Following the declaration of the State of Israel in 1948, neighboring Arab states, including Egypt, Jordan, Syria, and Iraq, launched a military intervention in Palestine, which eventually led to the first Arab-Israeli war.
1956 Suez Crisis: Israel, along with France and the United Kingdom, invaded the Sinai Peninsula in response to Egypt’s nationalization of the Suez Canal. – Bad Israel
1967 Six-Day War: Israel launched a preemptive strike against Egypt, Syria, and Jordan, resulting in the occupation of the West Bank, Gaza Strip, Sinai Peninsula, and Golan Heights. – Potentially Bad Israel – I was born during this war and I have not studied the points of instigation. This was when Israel brutally attacked a US Navy Science vessel.
1973 Yom Kippur War: Egypt and Syria launched a surprise attack on Israel during the Yom Kippur holiday, aiming to regain territories lost in 1967. – Bad Arabs acting on behalf of Israel.
1982 Lebanon War: Israel invaded Lebanon with the aim of eliminating Palestinian Liberation Organization (PLO) presence there, leading to a prolonged conflict. Bad Israel
First Intifada (1987-1993): A Palestinian uprising against Israeli occupation in the West Bank and Gaza Strip, marked by widespread protests and clashes. Bad Palestine
Second Intifada (2000-2005): A period of intensified Israeli-Palestinian violence, triggered by a visit by Ariel Sharon to the Temple Mount, leading to widespread conflict and incursions on both sides. Both bad.
Gaza War (2008-2009): Israel launched Operation Cast Lead in response to rocket attacks from Gaza, resulting in a large-scale military operation. Gaza got its dick smacked by Israel for its bad act.
Gaza War (2014): Israel launched Operation Protective Edge in response to rocket fire from Gaza and to destroy tunnels used by militants, resulting in a significant escalation of violence. Gaza once again got its dick smacked by Israel for another bad act.
2018-2019 Gaza border protests: Palestinians in Gaza launched mass protests along the Gaza-Israel border, which often led to clashes with Israeli forces. Protest are fine, but Israelis killing unarmed protesters is a party foul.
2021 Israel-Gaza conflict: Intense fighting between Israel and Hamas in Gaza, sparked by tensions in Jerusalem and subsequent rocket attacks from Gaza into Israel. Gaza once again got its smacked silly by Israel for another bad act.
2023 Hamas launches rockets into Israel from Gaza. Israel responds with a brutal pounding and several war crimes because the Israeli government is full of “Don’t give a fuck about what is right or wrong” it is only a war crime if they can play the victim.
In the end where does that leave me and my opinions? Well, My opinions are my own and hold no real value to others I suppose. I do however feel compelled to note as I did early in this post that the Palestinian leadership has brought most of this onto themselves. I predicted at the begingin of this latest action that Netanyahu would go scorched earth on the Palestinians.
The neighboring countries need to open their doors to the Palestinians and take in those refugees. Those refugees need to accept that Palestine no longer exists and hasn’t since 1948. There are likely very few of them that were born in Palestine.
As for Israel, the US needs to defund them and the government officials need to stand trial for their war crimes. Not for genocide either, but everything else. Palestinian is not a genus on the human branch of taxonomy.
For all I care, they could both lose the land and turn it into a UN sanctuary for displaced citizens around the world and those people could remain their as long as they were lawful and peaceful. If they cannot live peacefully, then they can be deported to wherever the hell they came from or whomever would accept them.
That phrase in an email at work caused me to have to have a friendly discussion with my boss. I will not go into that discussion beyond the fact that my use of the phase was known to be in a sense of humor.
The other party felt that it was offensive.
Okay, so are you so fucking self absorbed that your (I am assuming that it was their) feelings that felt infringed upon?
I have sat on this for a bit now and in some ways it has been brewing and stewing. It has visited me while I was going to sleep, or even waking up.
Should it bother me? Prebaby not, but it does.
I have to wonder if they are laying claim to the PTSD as they have experienced something in their lifetime. If they have experienced something, I hope that they heal from it.
But to deny me the use of the phrase Trigger Warning… or PTSD?
You can fuck right the hell off.
Do I have PTSD? damn right I do.
Lets touch on some of my past lives and areas where a little PTSD may be in order, so if you are tender of heart and not up for real feelings, please head to https://www.disney.com right now.
Trigger Warning…
I was a latchkey kid starting at 2nd grade. Yes, I know today it would be considered a shame for a child to wake, shower, dress, and feed themselves… it would be criminal for them to be allowed to hop on their bike (without a helmet even) and ride to school.
After school I would ride/walk home then have to entertain myself until 5-6pm when my father would get home. I really wish that he would take my calls so that I could express to him how sorry that I am that I was not a better kid, teen, or even early adult. I did not become a really good person until after he stopped taking my calls. I may cover that more later.
Trigger Warning…
While riding my bike one day, I was outriding bullies, I had a steep hill to get away, but it was not an easy ride down. I ended up hitting a rock and tumbling. I hit my head in the process and going unconscious. I have no idea how long I was out. When I came back to the real world, I walked my bike down Stark Street (for the non-local, just know that it is a major throughfare in Portland Oregon) and I passed a high school girl who looked at me and almost lost her lunch. I got back home and found out why, Most of my hair was matted blood. I probably told my dad about it when he got home. I was already cleaned up by then. It was not the first (or last) time that I patched myself up.
Trigger Warning…
One may get a little PTSD from getting into arguments to the nose to nose level with an outlaw biker step dad. Yes there was yelling… yes there was screaming… but once I stopped running form bullies and actually taking a stand and beating the fuck out of them for fun, I stopped backing down. I even got into one fight because another kid asked “Fuck you, wanna fight” Game on! But that is a story for another post. My mother quickly saw the writing on the wall, I was no longer interested in her or I being abused any further and that since a 15 year old was literacy nose to nose with a 50+ year old biker and not showing fear, I had to be extricated form the situation. {sorry sis, i know that we really have not talked about some of my baggage with your dad.]
Trigger Warning…
That same 15 year old trying to get into the bus that had been converted into a home… to unlock the door of an old bus, you do a CPR trust to pop the lock on the door release. Well I was having trouble that night. Then the door opened and I got to have my first stare down the barrel of a Colt 1911 .45ACP. Yes, it is an attention getter. Did I lose sleep over it? Nope, but it was only a day or two before I moved to the East Coast and started a new life. It was the last direct abuse that I endured from him.
Trigger Warning…
Before I went into the Army I was homeless for a short minute (after a serious of poor decisions/action so don’t think I am proclaiming innocence here). When my folks found out, They took me back in while I was waiting to ship to Fort Benning Georgia. I learned some things during that stint, but it was a mild lesson.
Trigger Warnings (multiple)…
While I was in basic training, I blew out one of my knees and was pulled from training. At first it was all oh poor your here, take some worthless pain pills and drive on private. When that did not work, they threatened to recycle me. (For my civilian friends, that means to start me from day one again) Well, that did not help me heal either. I know it is a damn shock isn’t it? So They put me in physical therapy for a while. Then I had a brand new doctor (I knew from her rank) tell me… “You know private, these injuries usually get better when you get home.” Inside I was livid and I wanted to yell “BITCH, I was fuckin homeless when I came into the Army, what makes you think that I want to go back?” Remember, I was not the kinder, and gentler Griz that you may now how yet… I was able to civilly tell her that I did not want out of the army as I had no place else to go. She then took my crutches away and kicked me out of physical therapy. As you can imaging, that also did not heal me, physically or mentally. The hobbling around blew out my other knee. I was pulled form training entirely and did desk duty in the office. Ultimately, they did a bone scan (another story for another day) and told me, “Private, Uncle Sam broke his new toy, and I am afraid that you will likely never walk straight again”. That took me to a very dark place and I started sketching things that my platoon mates noticed and reported to a drill sergeant. Next thing I now, I am having an appointment with a doc across the street to discuss my suicidal ideations. A month or two after that, I noticed that I was getting a weird vibe from the drill sergeants and officers around me and is was SUPER WEIRD. Then the Senior Drill called me over and told me to get in a vehicle. Odd, I have not been taken for a ride unless it was in the back of a deuce and a half (big truck folks). I was taken to Main Post, to the CID office. CID stands for Criminal Investigation Division. For you NCIS TV show fans, this is a Army version. It turned out that there was a guy back home that wanted to date my high school sweetheart who had broken up with me a couple years earlier… but He seemed to feel that I was in the way. How would I be cleared from his path to courtship? Well call the Battalion and claim that I was selling drugs in the company, not just little stuff either. apparently they thought that I was dealing cocaine. He was going to mail them the evidence that I was mailing it to his “girlfriend” Now I start studying law (as a hobbyist, in 8th grade (yes another story for another day)) I knew that it would mean nothing as the chain of evidence would be shit and any attorney could get that tossed, even if I represented myself, I could have. For the record, to that point of my life, I had never seen coke, let along taken or sold it. As of today, I have seen it, in other people’s possession, but I have not touched, handled, or consumed it in any way shape or form. My DD-214 friends know that this mere accusation ended my time in the service. There was a female agent in the room and I (even today) took my Military Customs and Courtesies class seriously. I am careful with my words in mixed company, unless I know that that company is okay with the words. I did have a few vehement slips in courtesies as I told him that his case was full of shit and that there was no evidence as I had done nothing of the kind. When I was discharged form the Army the following Monday, I called my ex to let her know that I would be heading back to town soon. She already knew that I was discharged and in fact the guy that was accusing me of crimes, told her before I had received my orders that I was being discharged and when. As a postal worker, how would he have known. So after a few weeks staying near Benning with friends, I headed back to Maryland. My ex let me stay in her guest room.
Trigger Warning…
After another bad decision, I moved out of her home to the streets, more specifically into a large park. Winter came quickly, and if you know Maryland, that is often not a pleasant thing it get damn cold, bitter to the bone cold. More bad decisions, but… I broke into a home nearby and stole camping gear, food, and wine. I was finding warm places to sleep when things were bad. I would sneak into a laundry room in an apartment complex and sack out behind the driers because they were warm. Sleep with women simply for a shower. I did get a job, buy could not earn enough to get out of the woods. I got “home” one night to find out that my entire campsite was gone. both tents and all of my belongings poof. I got caught sleeping in a room among the tunnels under the mall that I was working in. It turns out that I snore SOOOO badly that it can scare people (who knew?!?). My boss connected me with one of the food court staffers who rented rooms and I moved over there. It was pretty soon when the police that had seized my camp connected all of my uniforms, discharge papers, and medical records to my new job. They came to have a chat with me, and once again, I got to go for a ride. This ride resulted in cuffs, prints, and pictures. I may have to tell that story again for you later on.
I will skip a bunch of other trigger warnings for tonight
Trigger Warning…
Did you know that if you spend enough years in call centers taking many mean and angry callers that you can get a form of Tourette’s? When my phone rings I (and many other colleagues) reflexively curse. I have silenced my phone and it stayed silenced for years. It wasn’t until I wanted to be sure that I did not miss my current boss’ calls that I made changes to my phones settings. When he calls it now plays the Darth Vader March. It is not me being mean, it was his suggestion as I love him dearly. He has been the best boss in my many careers and I would walk over coals for him. When he retires, I will cry…
Trigger warning…
I am so pro-choice that I do not judge those that choose to end their own life. I have contemplated it many times.
Trigger Warning…
So if you think that you get to monopolize the phrases Trigger Warning or PTSD, you are likely a sadly mistaken millennial who has no fuckin’ clue as to what PTSD is really about. Have your life situations been as bad as what I have shared with you tonight? (I deeply hope not) I even held some things still within my mind and other elements I have discussed with nobody and never will.
Trigger Warning… PTSD Trigger Warning… PTSD Trigger Warning… PTSD Trigger Warning… PTSD